Contrary to Popular Belief

I can't simply enjoy the things in life that
people say never take for granted, but I stand
here alone and never doubt the broken hearted when they say
it's better to have loved and lost, then never loved at all.

Sitting on the sidelines always looking, never enjoying.
I claim depression, yet never seek any sunny days and happy
times. Can this fault rest on anyone's shoulders but mine?

Looking for a way out and seeking redemption, I look everywhere
but my own existence. Everything I have to work with seems
insufficient compared to others, but focusing on something
so trivial seems pointless.

Everything around me seems so grey and listless, but if I
just took another look around I'd see the life and forests.
It's contagious, a self-inflicted infection, and I can't
help but pick at the scab and wait for it to heal so I can
break it again just to have a slight bit of excitement.

I hate this life, but can't seem to shake it. It's all I've
known, so I'll just have to sit back and take it. It's broken,
and I don't know how to fix it. I tried to seal it, but the
cracks just came back twice as vicious. So here I am,
take it or leave it. It's a losing bet, so don't feel
compelled to step in. Let's face it.

It's the end, time to push back these feelings. Compose
myself and get ready to pretend. Depression is ugly
and so am I, so get ready 'cause I'm only just
beginning to let the blood fly. Contrary to popular belief,
I'm just a guy.